• I was born between the first & second World Wars.
  • I sold newspapers for my family but was fired when I created too many paper hats.
  • My soul occasionally rises and falls with the sounds of the ocean which carried my grandfather to this country from Bologna.
  • I don’t touch knives on account of the missing pinky finger on my left hand.
  • I didn’t lose the finger because of a knife… though that seems like the most likely scenario.
  • Fictionally, I lost my pinky finger while chasing a balloon across a farm field. Damn Windmill!
  • I stopped believing in the truth when my father gave up clowning and became a tax collector.
  • When I sit on the curb my large legs press my knees up next to my chin. From this position they more easily create a tunnel into which the water from passing cars can more efficiently be directed into my face.
  • When Nixon was elected I sat on the floor and didn’t get up until I was arrested for blocking the overpass of the freeway.
  • When Lincoln was shot and killed I wasn’t alive… but I laughed heartily at the illustrations.

[Troy, I found this and had to share it here. This is a great memory.]